


Still into you

by lecksie31



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Birthday, Doctor - Freeform, Love, M/M, Song: Still Into You (Paramore)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-08 00:55:38
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20826692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lecksie31/pseuds/lecksie31
Summary: On his 35th birthday, Junmyeon learns that there are just some people that you can never forget, feelings that you can never get rid of, no matter how many years has passed by.





	Still into you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Kalifer](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Kalifer).

> With another friend celebrating her birthday, here is the traditional celebratory fic. This one is for you, Kalifer! I hope you’re having a blast today. This is my small token of appreciation for being the wonderful person you are. Though we have only met each other for a short period of time, we’re already so close. Thank you for everything, I wish you a lifetime of happiness and I hope you like this.

***************

_Baby not a day goes by_  
that I’m not into you  
Yeah, after all this time, I’m still into you

I can’t even remember how many years it has been since we said our goodbyes. It feels like such a long time already, maybe 5 years by now? We were young and we were in love and to be honest, everything was out of our hands. The war was lost before we even started. It was a losing fight when you are fighting against a destiny that must be fulfilled.

_I have met the right person at the wrong time._

But I thought our love was stronger than this, I thought that we, of all people would survive the test of time, the test of distance, any test that life may throw at us but how wrong I was. Circumstances broke the relationship we had, brick by brick until there was nothing left of if it at all.

_In the end, we were not strong enough to survive to keep being together and that is why we broke up._

***************

For my 35th birthday, my friends threw a surprise party for me. I knew Kyungsoo was the mastermind behind this all. After all, Nini was so obvious, especially whenever I ask him to eat after work and he immediately declines and tells me he has something important to do. Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends and I couldn’t be happier for this surprise birthday party.

They even held it in my favorite restaurant, a fancy one at that. It seems they reserved the whole place. Well, I wouldn’t be surprised at all since this is owned by another close friend, Byun Baekhyun. The head chef, the one who prepared all the food was his boyfriend, Chanyeol. We all went our own ways but never failed to keep in touch. Even Jongdae and Minseok are here, the only one of us who got married early on. Coming from rich families themselves, they were star-crossed lovers who married so that their families couldn’t stop their love any longer.

Today was a happy celebration, and to be here with them means the world to me right now. They are no longer just friends to me, they are my family. When everything I had was taken away from me, when no one else was left beside me, they were the ones who held my hands, who made sure I would make it and that’s how I made it today.

_“Happy birthday, Junmyeon!”, _everyone shouted as the light went on as I entered the restaurant.

Immediately, everyone was crowding me, leading me to the chair in the center of the place.

_“Today, we prepared a small program just for you.”, _Baekhyun said in his emcee voice.

The room went dark and a projector turned on, and suddenly, a slide show of all our pictures started to play.

A trip down memory lane, that is what this is.

There we were, all eight of us on the beach, having the time of our lives. Look at us, Minseok and Jongdae being all sickeningly lovey-dovey. Chanyeol and Baekhyun having a friendly competition between them on who is the funniest. Jongin or Nini as we all like to call him, following Kyungsoo like a lost puppy. What a fun day that was, and as I was watching everything, I didn’t notice that tears were already falling from my eyes.

I am such a crybaby; I had always been and that must be why simple things easily makes me cry. This short video was made by my friends to make me happy and yet it makes me cry so badly. We were all so happy and innocent back then, way back 10 years ago. All of us spent our youth together and for that, I will always treasure them the best that I can.

The video ended and the lights went on. Everyone was staring at me, a grin on their faces.

_“You’re still such a crybaby, Junmyeon”_, Minseok says teasingly to me.

_“Some things never change.”, _Kyungsoo added.

I just nodded to them and wiped my tears away with my fingers. I don’t really cry a lot anymore like I did before but on these rare occasions that I do, it is always with them around. And I am grateful that they stuck with me through everything that had happened.

_“Next up, would be birthday wishes from all of us here. Let me start. Junmyeon, thank you for always putting up with me even if I am annoying. Let’s face it, you were always the most patient one here and even when my jokes go too far sometimes, you never once gotten angry with me. Please bear with me in the future too. Happy birthday, Junmyeon, I wish you the best.”,_ Baekhyun said as he handed me a small box.

_“Open it, it’s my present to you.”,_ he added.

I opened the blue box and what was inside were gift coupons, to none other than, this restaurant itself. I chuckled a bit. Baekhyun really knows how to make me smile.

_“Thank you, Baek.”_

Nini slowly went in front of me, grab the microphone out of Baekhyun’s hand and started speaking.

_“Junmyeon-hyung, you’re the best! Here’s my gift for you”_

Nini said with the brightest smile in his lips as he gave a big pouch to me. I opened it and it contained a big stuffed rabbit with a note that said _‘it looked like you, Junmyeon-hyung’_

Nini is pure innocence and I just love that about him.

Time went by fast and last but definitely not the least, Minseok, the oldest of all us, though I never called him hyung, was the one in the middle.

_“Junmyeon, you know that we love you, right? For this birthday of yours, we prepared you an important gift. Please don’t get mad at me.”_

And Minseok handed me a small gift.

A small green box that had a note not to open until I’m home.

After the gift-giving, we then ate and updated everyone about what had happened to each of us during the time we had last seen each other until now.

The party finished as fast as it started and before I knew it, I was already heading home.

***************

_On the drive back to my home_  
I told you that, I told you that I loved ya  
You felt the weight of the world  
fell off your shoulder  
and to your favorite song  
we sang along to the start of forever

I wonder if he remembers the one time we had a trip, way back, in LA. I was the one in the passenger seat then and he was driving. I flung my hand up in the air that time as the cool wind went past us. We drove a blue convertible and just had all the fun we can on that short trip. It was the most memorable trip I have ever had in my entire life. We were singing along to all of our favorite songs from the band we love the most, EXO. We sang to Growl, to Oh La La La, Lucky and a whole lot more.

One of the highlights of that trip was when he and I went into this store and he asked me to buy him this ridiculous pair of red sunglasses. But he asked me to, and he told me he would wear it all the time if I did and so I succumb and gave him what he wanted. I would never forget the smile on his face when I handed it to him.

The trip down memory lane ended fast as I reached my house. I headed straight to my room, showered and was about to go to sleep when I suddenly remembered Minseok’s gift to me.

Have you ever had this nervous feeling? I dreaded opening the green box because I felt some ominous aura coming from it and yet I did and inside it was a memory card.

Inside the flash drive were thousands of photos.

My tear ducts that I had thought dried up already started to flow again.

What the heck was all these?

This was all the photos I had already deleted from years ago.

_Photos of me together with a blonde man with Chanyeol at our back in a garden of roses._

_A photo of me and him in front of the Eiffel tower._

_A photo of him and a photo of me when we went to that museum in LA._

_The photo we had when we were on a yatch, with him not even wearing a shirt._

_The other photo we had when we were eating and I was half naked._

_The video of us together in bed._

_The photo of me on my birthday._

And a whole lot more.

What the heck was Minseok trying to do?

I was about to close everything when I saw the name of the drive.

**SEHUN (E:)**

And then I saw a folder at the end of all the photos.

_To Junmyeon_

I opened it and inside was 2 photographs.

The first one is a letter.

_Dearest Junmyeon,_

_I wonder how many years it has been since we broken up before you ever get to read this. _

_If there is anything, I have ever wanted to tell you, it’s that I am very sorry._

_Junmyeon, I love you with all that is in me._

_And in you, I found everything I was looking for, in you I found all that I can ever ask for._

_You were a blessing in disguise, you are an angel Junmyeon._

_For years, we were the best couple there ever was. And even as you entered the military to enlist, I waited for you and we remained as strong as possible. But I’m sorry that I disappeared on you when I enlisted._

_I knew you were waiting for me, I read all the letters you sent me while I was inside. _

_I wanted so bad to reply to you but I stopped myself._

_On the day of my release, after the service was finished, I was standing there, in a place where I can see you but you can’t see me and you don’t know how much my heart broke when I saw you waiting until our friends had to drag you away._

_I knew you were going to have a hard time._

_And I couldn’t even tell you a proper goodbye because I thought that maybe, if I end things this way between us, you would eventually move on._

_Junmyeon, I could never go back to you, I have degenerative memory loss and slowly, I am losing all of our memories. I am afraid that if I stay with you in the state that I am in, I am only going to hurt you even more. I am sorry, Junmyeon._

_I hope one day, you find it in you to forgive me._

_And I hope that when you read this, you have completely forgotten me._

_I will always love you, even when the time comes that I don’t remember you any longer._

_Always yours,_

_Sehun._

I let out a guttural cry after reading the message. On the next photo was a photo of Sehun smiling.

I called Minseok, and he answered immediately.

_“Minseok! What the hell is this?! Don’t tell me you had this with you all this time?!”_

_“No, Junmyeon, it arrived to me a week before your birthday, with instructions to give it to you.”_

_“Where is he Minseok, tell me. Hyung, where is he?”_

_“In the box I gave you, there is a small piece of paper, he’s there Junmyeon. I found him for you.”_

I dropped the phone call, got the box and saw the paper with the address.

I had to see him.

I drove my car and went straight to where he was.

It was a hospital that was not quite far from where I lived.

I can’t believe he was here all along.

As I got in front of the room, I let out a loud sigh as I held the handle of the door.

Room 412.

I was afraid to open it.

And just as I was about to open it, suddenly, a nurse opened the door and a lot of people came inside.

_“Who is the doctor assigned to patient Oh Sehun? He is going into cardiac arrest, we are going to try and revive him.”_

I panicked but my instincts took over my body.

_“Move aside, I’m a doctor.”_

And I tried my best, did all that I can to revive him but the heart rate monitor beside him drew a straight line.

***************

_And baby even on out worst nights_  
I’m into you  
yeah after all this time, I’m still into you 

What is the point of being a doctor and having years of experience if I couldn’t even save the one I love the most?

I felt like such a failure for having lost the one I have been waiting for all this time on my birthday.

I was given a note from the nurse that took care of him when he was alive.

She told me that every day, Sehun would look out the window, wrote something in a piece of paper and cry silently as he uttered a name over and over.

And what she gave me was the last note.

I opened it.

_It takes so much courage to let go than to hold on. _

I asked her if she can remember the name that he mutters.

And she told me it was:

_Jun._

I dropped to my knees.

_He has never forgotten me._

***************

There are memories in this life that you can never forget.

_The first time you kissed someone._

_The first time your heart broke._

_The first person you fell in love with._

And there are people that you can never forget no matter how much time pass you by.

Oh Sehun, until the very last breath I take, I promise, I would never forget you and the love we shared.

***************

It was 5 years after his death that I was able to open the flash drive once again because I missed him badly. And who would have known that I missed to open a video file.

I opened it.

It was Oh Sehun, looking very much healthy and happy, smiling from ear to ear.

_“Jun! Hi! It’s my second year here inside the military and I miss you so much. Today is your birthday! I wish I was there with you. I love you baby! I’ll come home to you soon!”_

***************

Sometimes, there is just no happy ending in real life.

I never found another person who meant to me as much as he did.

_Loving him wasn't all rainbows and butterflies like in the movies but it is something I would never regret._

10 years later, as I lay in my death bed, with all of my friends surrounding me, I smiled.

I took my last breath with a smile as I saw Sehun holding his hand out to me, as if asking me to come with him.

_“Sehun, I love you.”_

***************

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you found solace in reading this one. I promise the next thing I write here will be fluff~


End file.
